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Old Bulletins

Old bulletin board
Dec. 3rd, 2002
After reports that eks-wrestler Baron Fritz has joined the Aros Blood Bowl Legue, Chaos Dwarf Blocker Fuglemanden from Sikoiners (who was also a wrestler before becoming a Blood Bowl player), has issued a press statement:

"HA, Baron Bunghole think him gots a chanse in Aros?!?!
Me kik hims arse more times in da rings, tan me remembers!!! An noooo changue on blod buwl feelds!
Him alvous cry and cal for mommy, an him gonna do lots moe o dat!!!
Puny-greeanfaced-Fritz-Tiits: U goen DOWN!!! (again...hehehe)"
- Sune
Oct. 30th, 2002
Do you have any idea how ridiculous a Chaos Dwarf lookes when he cries?
Well this reporter found out after Sikoinerz latest match against Dark Moon Dirglers!
Only two touchdowns where scored during this "blood-fest" of a match (both teams seemed too preocupied to worry about the ball). The 6-4 casualty score on the other hand, says it all!
But while Sikoinerz were responsible for the most casualties, they also suffered the worst blows. Not only was a Chaos Dwarf blocker killed, the team“s beloved Bull Centaur "Blęs" also lost his life.
It was the fans of Dark Moon Dirglers that got the better of "Blęs". Apperently the frustration of being last in their group came to a head during the match, as Dirgler fans also chased away the ref. for the entire first half of the game.

It seemed that the shortest dwarf on the team (Lil“asger) was particularly attached to the Bull Centaur:
(In a sobing, dripping voice:) "tem daammm ORKS... tem kill bestest player in world.... him so nice... alvaus gimme piggu-bak-ridge....Ims swere: only gonna kill orks now...kill aaL ORKS ALL OWER AAAALL WOLDD-AAAAAARRGGGGG!!!"
- Sune
Oct. 22nd, 2002
Sikoinerz took home a narrow win in tuesday nights top match in group A.
The battle for top spot in the group had both teams pull out something ekstra. And the result was a field crowded with power-players: 2 Rat Ogres 3 Bullcentaurs and a Minotaur. But in spite of this massive turnout, the match was not all that violent. Only three players where forced to leave the game enterely.
But Sikoinerz“ usual superior playing style was somewhat compromised, as Headz “n“Tailz scored the first td aginst Sikoinerz this season. As wel as inflicting the third and fourth casualty against them, including a second kill!
Snegzilla (head coach of Sikoinerz) commentated shortly after the game:
"Yeaaas, tis was not ouuure biiggest win - but we no care! tem only close coose tem cheeet!!! tem bring veeeery big rat (not easy make snack of him!) - an wees only bring tiny tiny nice cowman, him not hurt anuone!!!
Anaywho wees no caere!!! wees win al games an wees kills al plaors - simpl, no?!!!"
- Sune
Oct. 9th, 2002
"Mvahaaahaaa!!! - wese gnosh “n“ wese bosh tem stupid orcs!. Tem not iven now wat hit“em, wese too fast an too meen to be fraid of aaaaany team. An wese gonna win all da trophy tis year!!!"
- An exited Snegzilla (head-coach of Sikoinerz), after tuesday nights win over the Orc team Drackwald Convicts. The match was actually rather uneventfull, and Sikoinerz 1-0 win was a close call. And mainly due to a confused Orc blitzer, who on his way to the end zone totally forgot his purpose, and stopped to cheer his teams fighting on the line of scrimage.

The game ended when a riot broke out in the stands, and the field was flooded with hordes of screaming Chaos Dwarf females. This incident started when eks. pro wrestler Fuglemanden took of his shirt and started flexing his pecs (ed: we apolegise if this image offends you). Fuglemanden, took home his fourth MVP, and this time it was acually motivated by his performance on the field, where Fuglemanden got his first kill (which was the first starplayerpoints he earnt on the field at all!).
Fuglemanden was heard screaming "U love mee, you reeeealy loove meee!!!" when he was caried away in the sea of beards, as the female fans stormed the field.

Snegzilla has still not been able to locate Fuglemanden, but there has been some anziety amongst the training staff as to the health of Fuglemanden (Chaos Dwarf females are not well known for their gentle touch).
Snegzilla has promissed a press conference as soon as Fuglemanden is back at The Doom Dome (Sikoinerz home stadium). Until them millions of devoted fans vait in terror on news of their hero.
- Sune
Oct. 6th, 2002
-The only comment we could get from Tue on the upcoming match against Brackwald Convicts?!?!
- Sune
Sep. 21st, 2002
Once again Sikoinerz won a game thanks to their brute force an lust for blood.
In a sneak premier of round 2 of season 9, Sikoinerz gave the 49“ers a “warm welcome” at their home stadium (The Doom Dome).
Sikoinerz beat Chaos 49 2-0, and inflicted 6 casualties (including one kill) only suffering 1 casualty themselves which the teams doctor could luckily fix. Snegzillas “strategy” of pure violence seems to be working in the teams second season on the field.
As one spectator commented: “It was terrible. That mad cow was all over the field! I mean 600 pounds of bovine against an 80 pound docile rodent… What“s fair about that? And the way those evil sadistic hobgoblins enjoyed maiming the rats that was already down (my good, the humanity…) Those poor, poor rats…!”
“Yeees we gnosh “n“ we bosh them dirty vermin, and wee likes it!!!” –Snegzilla
So it looks like Sikoinerz are going to do better than last year, in the new season. But it will be interesting to see if the team can do as much damage against the more robust teams like Chaos and Orc.
- Sune
Sep. 17th, 2002
Sikoinerz got of to a flying start in the new season! Winning their first match against the starting team "Kiss of Death" 3-0.
For once Tues sadistic rage was targeted at the right team, and he played a key part in the victory; bodyslaming tiny elves in a row.
Sikoinerz hurt 4 elves and killed another 3. Among the dead was "Kiss of Deaths" fancy-pants Dragon warrior.
The Bullcentaurs had lots of room to score the touchdowns while the other players were hurting elves. And Blęs scored his first Touchdown, ending Geos position as the teams only scorer.
"Now we ready. Last season don’t count. We no ready. But now we ready! We gonna crosh n“ gnosh all them other teams, until them all dead!"-Snegzilla (head coach of Sikoinerz).
- Sune
Sep. 10th, 2002
Snegzilla (head-coach of Sikoinerz) would like to deny any rumours of "cruelty towards animals" against Tue (the teams Minotaur) during the off-season.
Apperently a rumour has been circulating that Tue was kept in a small cage during the entire off-season; feed nothing but scraps of Human and Elf flesh, and repeatedly poked with sticks. All of this supposedly to increase his ferocity.
But Sneglzilla replied to this roumer: "Wees looove thems minos, wees treat veeery nice!!! Wees always feed, always clap head, always take for walk. Never hit with stick, never keep hungry, never feed live elfs, neeeeeeveer. - Him like litle nice dog
- Sune
Race:  Chaos Dwarf
Coach:  Sune

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